Monday, 27 December 2010

And The Jailhouse Rocked

GingerNut's band played their iffy little socks off at both their prison gigs. The guys were allowed to mingle with the inmates while in the entertainment hall. It was one of the best gigs they ever played, an experience that will last. The band had the girls on their feet, clapping and singing, while one was asked to join them onstage to sing. 

The ladies of Cornton Vale Prison highly appreciated the show. Some had great stories to tell, some were stunner-tagged, some gentle spoken and some reeking of pure regret. The band came away with a little food for thought, inspiration for future material and a whole range of respect. Music will always connect creeds, no matter which roads we decide to take, and come out at the end united in perfect harmony. Even with the odd duff note or two..........

Thursday, 16 December 2010

Aisle Be Buggered!

Twice, now - in under a fortnight - I have been snubbed in the supermarket by a 'friend'. Libby. Quite deliberately and openly she has clocked me and about turned. Off in the direction of the deli-counter for smoked peacocks vomit or something rich and similarly unpalatable. Not that I'm usually fussed about who eats what. It's a little go at swallowing her pride she should try to order . Attitude and gratitude are free.

Why, you may ask, am I so bothered about this? I mean, we've all done it from time to time, and it's not the end of the world. I'll try to explain.

An old friend of my husband's (Bobby) married Libby around 7 years ago. She has a teenaged son - another Adam - from her first marriage. Bobby used to go fishing regularly with my hubby but that lessened as the years passed. They did attend a couple of barbeques of ours but hadn't stayed long. Our only contact whittled to Christmas cards. My husband missed his old fishing friend.

Last year, in the lead up to Christmas, Bobby called out of the blue, asking if PrettyBoy or GingerNut could teach Adam a few chords and rhythms on guitar as he wanted one for Christmas. Pretty Boy said that that would be no bother, so Adam came home straight to my house from school for a 90 minute session with him. He was offered some money for the lessons (as it would have cost £20 per half hour from his music teacher) but his little pupil learning things quickly was reward enough. Bobby picked him up after each lesson. By Christmas the little guy could play a whole song, plus managed to read simplistic musical notes and chords.

We were thanked and given an extra big card and tin of biccies, showing their appreciation. And we hadn't see hilt nor hair of them for most of this year. No arranged fishing trips with my hubby (as was agreed). An old loyal friend at one time. No invite to any of the barbeque that they arranged.

So, when I get treated with disdain, utter brazen rudeness, it really gets my goat. Heck, I even made out an exasperated sigh on her second aisle dodge. We really don't have a lot in common so I doubt if the 'conversation' would have lasted more than an awkward minute. But not even a daft wee acknowledgement. No smile. No wave. Not even a nod. She drives, lives, and dresses far more than my budget will ever cater for. But I'd rather be clad with holes and tears everywhere than scuffing the supermarket floor with Jimmy Choo heels in an quick, escapee spin.

Tuesday, 7 December 2010

No Need For Eyeballs - Just Your Ears.......

Here's my younger son's band NO NEED FOR IDOLS, with their latest recording. I am simply stunned at how a bunch of 16 & 17 year-old's come away with this kind of talent. While some kids that age wile away the hours and school holidays ect, setting fire to things, these guys come up with musical magic. Oliver - the lead singer - has the most amazing voice for such a scrawny wee thing, a two-pint-wonder even but I noticed the talent in him from an early age. Anyhow - have a listen, it's a beautiful wee number:
Find more artists like No Need for Idols at Myspace Music

Tuesday, 23 November 2010

OnlyThe Best Tatt Ever......

Bet this hurt more AFTER the final nip from the needle:

Thursday, 18 November 2010

No Need To Panic!

It may be the smallest venue EVER, with the most expensive bar, but my younger son's band No Need For Idols are headlining at Behind The Wall in Falkirk, tonight. It'll be a fight between me, Trish (the bassist's mum) and a hundred-odd teenagers to bag the booth at the back to climb up on to, to see the bands and take fab pics from there, otherwise we'd drown in a sea of elbows, pogo-ing, hair pulling, slidey floor, dropped cameras/phones, heels and B.O.

So, see you there, sons. And I pwomise, we won't show you up tonight. We'll be as good as gold, no screaming, swearing, AND we'll stay put. No Need To Sidle. 

I'm a very naughty girl but here's the link for a sneaky scrappy listen to Casino' s new tune:   http://helenshere.blogspot.com/2010/11/starlight.html

Tuesday, 9 November 2010

Office-ensive Puss-Puss

I love this new version of the classic upload. The guy who does the voice over is spot on (well not entirely as PrettyBoy pointed out - snob!!) and it's hilarious. Nothing like a kitty to cheer up your day....

Saturday, 6 November 2010

Move Over Pudsy......

For the charity Movember, (a portmanteau of the words 'moustache' and 'November') that originated in Australia, my two son's are helping fight prostate and other cancers facing men, by being scruffy little gits. For the whole of November they are not gonna shave under their noses. Hormonally, the younger one is only 16 and shouldn't need to shave. It wasn't so long ago he was still playing with his Action Man squad. They now sport Barbie clothes whenever I babysit the niece. There is nothing wrong with transvestism or gay play in childrens development these days.

Anyhow, back to the absence of hairs on their chinny-chin-chins to jaggy philtrums. PrettyBoy's university's follicle-ridden scrawny imports are mostly all joining in. (So could some of the girls, apparently.)They must start the month clean-shaven and let nature and eventually fibre putty, take it's course. The more ridiculous the 'tache, the better. Gingernut (who's bottle blonde in the pic) grows his body hair at a rate 4 times quicker than his brother's, so by Dec 1st he'd be like Grizzly Adam's if he left that chin alone.

To help boost the donations, PrettyBoy is getting his band Casino's (you know - the band every other band fucking hate) front man, Telfer, (who's a stylist - hair not clothes!) to dye his 'tache black and give it 70's handle-bar extensions for the final snap.

In ridiculous anticipation of how they or others may look they dipped my make up bag and mascara'd their tache's and present facial hair before the big shave. Here's the result........GingerNut looking cheeky, PrettyBoy looking glaikit and both looking for a healthy future as they continue to sprout!
                                                                    http://uk.movember.com/

Sunday, 31 October 2010

Sunday Snippet (23)

I quite like a good Sunday surfing - telly controls to myself and all that.


I remember seeing a few weeks ago, a man being arrested for trying to smuggle 2 kilograms of cocaine into the United Kingdom. Today, I saw a man being arrested for trying to smuggle 10 kilograms out of the United Kingdom. I wish they'd make their minds up. Do they want the stuff or not...!?

Tuesday, 26 October 2010

I'm Buzzing.........!

Viola - I've managed to work out the chords to Green Day's, When September Ends, before GingerNut gets home from college (not that they were THAT difficult given the band!) but he said I wouldn't as it starts in G whereas I'm an A kinda girl. To boot he's buying pizza tonight since I won. Arse!

I actually wanted to learn the song, as a friend and neighbour's son has been accepted to join the army. He's been a mate to my kids all his life and I can't get over how grown up they all are. In January he's leaving home for full training so my boys want to see him off via lots of beer and we'll sing a few choice in honour of him. I know my heart will wrench when I see him in his gear. Just as long as his spirits are like this guy's, he'll be fine:



Good Luck with the slang!

Tuesday, 12 October 2010

The Long And Short Of It!

For the past two nights I had been trying unsuccessfully to watch a film free online, without downloading things wiff words that I don't understand, to my hard drive whatsit. Just a simple click and off I go. Despite having tried ALL of the suggestions from PrettyBoy (for new comers that's my older son!) nothing came about. This morning, before he scadoodled off to uni, he bet me that the film I wanted to watch again (Lolita 1997) he could get me online, free, with no great hassle. And he did. Within minutes. I was in such utter delirium that I promised him I'd buy him a new shirt on Thursday (as he needs more clobber to fill the laundry basket at uni - there's a prize for the biggest pile within a month!). He wanted a nice hooded, long-sleeved, checked shirt in grey and black if poss!

So, here I sat, loving my Nabokov adaptation and Lo(lita) and behold, at 72 mins a pop-up appeared, stopping the film saying I had expired my bandwith blah, blah, blah. Wanted dosh then, didn't they....? Cnuts! It said FREE...! I'll buy the DVD on Thursday *SIGH*

Oh, well. I suppose I did get enjoyment from what I did see if not the full version. A promise is a promise, though. On Thursday PrettyBoy gets a nice short-sleeved, plain black shirt! See how HE likes it.....Git!

Sunday, 10 October 2010

Why Can't They Just Pop Off......!

Okay. It's October. Seasonally, I'm getting happier. I'd be bloody delirious if the Scottish midge would sod off completely.  I hung a rather large washing out recently and the sun accompanied a warmish breeze. That's all it took. Out like Kamikaze's, diving for any pasty skin they could find. And the little gits did! We're getting a ground frost here in the land of scratch and they're still appearing. They have been sworn at in countless languages. They're bad for our tourism. Other countries' nasties pale them in size comparison but still the wee shits get their big bite kicks.

I remember many moons ago, during my college days, I worked in a fast food outlet. My friend and I used to take bets on what type of insect would be next to frazzle in the ultraviolet insect zapper. We tipped out a variety of bugs at the end of the night. Not once did a midge get singed.

Of course, I don't hate all insects, I'm fairly bee and wasp friendly (meaning I don't flap about like a loon in one's company) and a few are entertaining. House fly's make great targets with table tennis bats. 5 points for every dead one that hits the deck! I'll leave you with a song that I heard a long, long time ago. Every word is still as true! Have fun working some of the lyrics out...!

Sunday, 26 September 2010

Sunday Snippet (22)

I love eating out. Especially if it's junk. But I got right pissed off with Pizza Hut. It's so called 'unlimited refills' are a joke. You try going back with your glass a week later. They won't serve you! And the same goes for their ice-cream factory stall. Bastards.

~~~ Thanks for popping by ~~~

Thursday, 23 September 2010

Sweet Dreams....?

As a committed insomniac, I take the chance to wile away the hours on my rubbery sofa with some night time food (ice cream) and a surf on TV to see what is on.  That is how I have come across the majority of my most favourite teary-spill films. I'm not a firm film fan, don't go the movies or Blockbuster that often so a whole bunch of these are pre-mummahood/bored shitless inflicted or DVD pressies. But I'd like to list the Top 20 films that I've, quite openly, cried to.

 I have added a bit of my own opinion/narration and it's okay to skip a few movies if you've already seen them but a read over what you haven't won't go amiss. Then again if you have seeneed the flick and not likeed  it well, maybe you've just not watcheed it right! Anyhow...they're probably not all the most 'typical' films to cry over but you can't force that throat lump back down when he's adamant. So, (apart from the top 2) here's what I will/have bubbled to.... in no certain order of boo-hoo merit.

*this will appear in the narration at the part that makes me cry.
 1. The Luzhin Defence....A Nabokov book I didn't read but just caught the film one night. A film my father banged on about but couldn't convince me to ever watch. A high society film, based in the 30's about chess..! Me? Watch that? Never! But I did. Love, passion, obsession, childhood,  metal torture are all included. It's not just prawn take pastor or whatever.  *when Natalia sees the love of her life splattered on the deck it's bad enough, but when she says 'checkmate' I'm in floods again*. I seriously urge you to see this film. It was the best night's sleep I never had! You don't have to be a maestro to appreciate it......


 2. The Prophecy.....when Archangel Gabriel - who is a right cnut in this film - loses his fight for Heaven to Lucifer, and old Luce draggs him up some stairs eating the heart he just ripped from him is bad enough but *seeing Gabriel's eyes are hollow and black  means death of an angel* - I just lose it. He was the meanest (but funniest) angel to ever avemge man, too!


 3. Greyfriar's Bobby....*oh, who couldn't  well up at this little Scottish doggie who defended his owner's grave for weeks on end and had the decency never to piss on it? This film is an asterisk all the way through!


 4. Mask....I'll be honest. I can't bloody stand Cher. Yuk! Yuk! Yuk! But she played the part of mum with an articulate and severely disfigured young man brilliantly. A few teary bits - specially when he meets a blind beauty who loves him for his heart. Bad enough for having Cher for a mum but *as she holds him dying of course* Top points to Eric Stoltz who'd played Rocky.


 5. The Legend Of The Holy Drinker......I love this film. Set in 1930's Paris. A homeless drunk  man is lent 200 francs by a kind tee-totaller on the promise that he pays the money back to the church. Gobsmacked by the generosity he promises to do just that and as he tries to keep to his word he is met with all kind of problems. It gives him an insight into his past and some of his 'imaginary' visions are very touching. Specially when his dead parents appear before him. But the biggest bawler bit *when he actually meets up with his daughter again by chance as she's waiting for her her mum and 'new' dad. In a cafe he approaches and asks her name and he realises who she is when she says 'Derese'. ' I had a daughter named that ' he replies!*  She, sadly never knew the kind-and- broken-hearted smelly, filthy man accosting her was her dad.

 6. Edward Scissorhands.....well, what's not to feel bad about a great looking freak with blades for hands? We women who raised kids in the 90's MUST know this film. Saddest bit * when she asks him to hold her and he holds up those blades and says "I can't" Personally, I'd have had the bandages at the ready and took my chances......


 7. Fatherland...okay - hands up who liked Hitler? Well, in this fiction based WW2 win to the Germans the story takes on a divorced father's (Berlin detective) struggle with an American journalist to let The President REALLY know what Hitler covered up, while trying to wane his child's admiration of The Fuhrer.  But when the Gestapo discover that he's looking into a series of mystery German deaths via the pretty journalist they want a quiet word - via a bullet to the chest! It's a bit far fetched but touching nonetheless but.... *when he's dying in a phone box , calling to let his son know he's not to blame for the bullet (the little shit let the cat out of the bag!) he pegs it and flops to the floor. That's pretty sad!

 8. The Colour Purple...what poor Celie endured. Eventually the man did the nice deed of reuniting her with her kids and sister. I'm welling up even at the thought but...* obviously at the reunion. She couldn't touch them for a short while as she was in huge disbelief but those hugs and kissesI've gobbed in a man's drink before (several times) and it felt goooood!


 9. The Elephant Man....I watched this film to retching point in the 80's. I played it so many times as I couldn't believe how society (even for Victorian England) treated him. I've only watched it a few times since. I think this must be an asterisk most of the way through, too.


10. Ladyhawke.....mythical medieval nonsense about a demon Bishop's jealous curse that separates two lovers into creatures, the man a wolf, the girl a hawk. They no longer literally 'see' each other as by night he turns into the wolf and by dawn she turns into the hawk. They still partner each other nonetheless (but nothing animal right's need worry about). Anyhow the curse eventually gets lifted by an eclipse or something and human 'wolfie' spears the Bishop turns around and voila - there's his lady no longer a hawke! * the gushing reunion and joy of being wingless and two legged again!


11. The Yearling.....*.wahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! *sniff sniff* wahhhhhhhhhhhhh*bigger sniff*.....*


12. Lolita (1997).....I'm not a strict Nabokov bookie but I read this at high school and it was very controversial back then, but this film gets to my emotions. I actually quite feel it for the young girl and her mother's older lodger-who-rodgered her. A manipulating, scheming nymphet who's sexual advances he's addicted to and I feel it when Humbert  realises he's lost his Lolita for good. *when she hears that her mother is dead and curls on the bed to cry.......still a kid*. It is probably seen by many as a bit dodgy but Juliet was no wee angel either!

13. The Exorcist.......wtf? Yes you read correctly!  I still love it. Utter tripe and spooky and probably one of the most ridiculously iconic films for life. But seeing Father Karras jump out that window, taking the little girl's demon with him to his death is bad enough but* watching him splattered on the pavement, making his peace with God via his fingers and best friend just chokes me.


14. Bram Stoker's Dracula......'Love Never Dies'.....ah, that line. There is something so romantic in vampire stories (proper ones - none of this Twilight mince).  Cold blooded killers but they know how to fall in love and resist the taste at the same time. And just because it's another horror film doesn't mean a dry face. Well, maybe I'm just a (blood) sucker for all romancers. *When old Vlad beg her to chop off his head to give him 'peace'. She kisses his centuries-old face then wallop - it's all over. The painted ceiling of him and Elizabetha above them*

15 . Bladerunner.....The famous android with feelings film. Loved Rutger Hauer in this film (and those final scene shorts he was wearing!) He may have popped the eyes with his thumbs from the professor who couldn't give him life,  now he'd discover emotions, but *those final words when he knew he was about to snuff it "Time To Die" and the dove flies as his head flops has me reaching for the tissues/sleeve of what I'm wearing.

16. Tokyo Sonata......one of the nicer things about insomnia is I watch films that I usually wouldn't - namely subtitled ones. Only because as I was growing up they were referred to as 'shite'. You wouldn't believe the world cinema films I've watched and loved now. And reading the words helps get you through till dawn. This one was brilliant about a  Japanese father down on his luck, up in his pride trying his best to hide he'd been sacked. His older son wants to join the 'army' as his younger son is hiding his school dinner money to pay for secret piano lessons after finding an old organ in a bin. Ultimately he goes nuts at this and takes out all his life's frustrations on the little boy until he turns into his teacher's protege, eventually making enough money to support his family. *His dad watching him play to a room full of class musicians with a standing ovation to boot.*  Lovely stuff!


17. Schindler's List....I don't think I need to state when for this film.


18. Some Kind Of Wonderful......right. High school high class bit of skirt is fancied by a drummer in a band. His best friend, a pretty tomboy he known for year is in same band and now fancies him. Yuk! he thinks, as this other bit of totty is hot! Not! Yes she turns out to be a snobby blah, blah, blah, and the bandmates ultimately, well, mate for good. *THAT KISS*   My girlie ultimate chicky flicky with my utmost favourite movie lines...Girl:  This is 1987. D'you know a girl can be what she wants to be?!"      Boy:  "I know. My mum's a plumber."

19. Aye Fond Kiss.....world religion standing in the way of true love again. A Glaswegian lad of Pakistani origin and an Irish music teacher working in a local Catholic school fall in love. He's been 'promised' to his first cousin - which wasn't a problem at first but his devout parents and her damned boss ( a priest) put their tuppence worth's in. Of course,  loyalties and pressure split them up. What I love about this film is that Casim has a strong Scottish accent - slang and all.  Colour and voices - they don't always go together as nature intended but to me, that encapsulates a strong accepting world of wonderful mixes when you come across it. *She sits crying at the piano when he walks back in the door*.  ps.......yes, the title was taken from that Rabbie Burns song!


20. Moolade.....one of the most profound films I've watched. An African woman from a small village is opposed to female genital circumcision, which generations have called 'purification'. Colle does her utmost to save the little girls (aged from 6-9)  there from going through the same. She's beaten senseless as she does her best to protect those little angels from the knife but she wins in the end. * Watching crying mothers holding their daughters, bleeding to death, when it goes wrong*  Powerful stuff!


Well, that's all folks. I'm not touting for HMV or Amazon or anything but if you haven't seen any of these movies and come across them you might want to give them a go. You'll probably be braver than me.....! Sadly, I haven't once cried myself to sleep......................night night. I'll be back to edit tomorrow!







Sunday, 12 September 2010

Sunday Snippet (21)

I recently read that William Shakespeare died on the same day that he was born, 23rd of April. No wonder he was known as a fucking genius if he wrote nigh on 37 plays and all them sonnets and poems in one day!

Saturday, 4 September 2010

London At Last!

I don't think I've mentioned them before *cough* but my older son's band Casino  have been invited down to London to play a couple of gigs.  They are in fact ready to perform right now and my daughter (who lives in London ) has JUST posted me this pic off her phone:
Tonight they play The Hope and Anchor in Islington - where a lot of Londonish bands debuted from (such as Keane) and punk rock established from!  Tomorrow night they will be playing in Tommy Flynn's in Camden. For a young, Scottish band that mainly circuits the central belt of their mother-country, methinks this experience will do them good. Here's hoping this promoter appreciates the amount of work and dues to their fans that Casino gives and sees the potential they have and rising talent that has, and continues, to grow from Scotland. Well, we've got to be good at something as we're shit at football!

Friday, 27 August 2010

Cat-Nipped

I just love this little fellow! Pass the ice, then!

Monday, 16 August 2010

What Can You See.....?

We very recently and sadly threw out a lot of video's. It was a shame as we had a huge collection over the years and some television recordings that will never be aired again - but technology usually wins. Anyhow, while chucking old ones out from a cupboard, I came across this dusty old cover. Now I don't know about you, but I can make out (in dust) a bit of a picture here! I'm not gonna say what I see, as I give you the chance first to see what you make of it. In around a week I will draw over the section where I see a picture. My only clue is that it looks romantic! Now don't be expecting Renaissance or such like!! And yes, I am a ridiculous hoarder of 'just in case' stuff!  I've taken the pic under 3 different light conditions Here we go.............click for the bigger pic!




 and one week later. What a load of dust. It's amazing what I do to amuse myself! Should have gone to Specsavers...?

Sunday, 8 August 2010

Well Done, Addie.....Ma Clever Wee Laddie!

Huge congrats to my younger son, Adam (Gingernut) who passed his higher exams on Tuesday (his music and drama ones with flying colours!)  He was pacing up and down waiting on our postman for the results. Jumped up and down like a nut for a minute once they'd arrived as he got A's and B's!  Ten minutes later, he was looking as thus:
Sitting on the settee, picking your lunch from your teeth in your football gear while you watch the telly waiting on your mates to call, wasn't quite the image I envisaged. Oh, how that indifference was greatly achieved. Well done, son.

Sunday, 1 August 2010

Sunday Snippet (20)

They call prostitution the oldest profession in the world. If that's the case, how did the blokes earn the money to pay for it..?

Thursday, 29 July 2010

The Rythm Of Life

Despite the drums showing in this video still, this post is about domestic violance. It is very disturbing and is an experiment to test today's society. Sometimes, I'm ashamed to be human.

Sunday, 25 July 2010

Sunday Snippet (19)

Where in the Bible does it say that it's fine for Christians to eat sausages...? Where?....In Leviticus: Chapter 11, God states quite clearly that no -one is allowed to eat pigs, but I can't find the bit where than ban was lifted for the C of  E .     Thou Shalt Not Grill, indeed........!

Tuesday, 13 July 2010

Hello, Hello........3 In A Row.......!

I'm popping up a few pics of my recent celebrations. I don't go out much or indeed host parties, so these long weekend snaps won't be repeating themselves for a heck of a long time, if ever!


On the Friday my younger son's band No Need For Idols  were playing at Barrowland in Glasgow. It's quite exciting knowing that your son and his friends are actually performing on the same stage that some of your own idols have. It was also the first time Gingernut's big sis and bruv-in-law were seeing them live. Sadly, the drummer is usually stuck behind cymbals! My fave few pics, anyhow:












On the Saturday the cheaper-half and I attended the 25th wedding anniversary of my ex sister-in-law and her hubby, my daughter's auntie from my first marriage. Yes, my ex-husband and his family were there, too. While we all have my daughter to share, we all stay bonded and keep in touch. I still receive recipe's from my ex-mother-in-law. Life's too short to hold on to bad feeling, something I'm happy to say dissolved between our families many moons ago. It's all for the children, after all. My fave few pics:
































Sunday finished with a bang - somewhat literally.  To celebrate his H.N.D., we threw a party/barbeque  for Ross and his two friends who passed with him. As you know Ross/PrettyBoy/Kez ......is in a band (that I hardly ever mention) and the guys from Casino brought along their acoustic guitars to have a open-air jam.  They played quite a few Beatles songs in perfect harmony, as well as other requests - mainly their own songs.  Here's my 3, well 4, well, 5, oh, go on then, 6 favourite pics:












Sunday, 20 June 2010

Sunday Snippet (18)

In this modern age it is possible to tell from the markings on a bullet which gun it was fired from.  Wouldn't it be great if someday we are able to tell from the ridges on a dog shit which dog's arse delivered it, thus allowing the owner's face to be rubbed in it!

Wednesday, 16 June 2010

Dani's Q's

Today I am in answer mode.  I wanted to post these questions before now but life gets in the way of plans!  So here, from the delectable Dani, are the questions she put to us:

1. When and where would you like to be right now?

In London with my daughter. I miss her like mad but she's visiting soon.

2. What's your favorite thing ever? (It can be anything.)

Haagen-Dazs Pralines and Cream ice cream. I'm a slut for the stuff!

3. Why should I vote for you to be the president?

Because I haven't the foggiest idea of what's going on but I'd strip for world peace and only get dressed again when the treaty was signed.

4. How do you remember appointments and such? (I need some tips from this one.)

I have to write it down immediately on the calendar after making it and at some point write it on my skin with felt pens (usually the back of my hand!) the day before. This can be a bugger if you need the loo a lot!

5. Would you rather stop hunger or homelessness?

Homelessness. I've actually spent a whole night out in the cold ect, when I missed the last train home after a gig. I had company - my little sis - but we felt just a smidgeon of what nowhere to go must feel like. Something I wouldn't want to do again.

6. Do you like things to be clean? As in SPOTLESS. (I know a few people like that...)

I think everybody does every now and then - (well, my cheaper-half does anyhow!) - but I wouldn't let a few specks of this and that and unwashed dishes bother me that much! I will NEVER let a tidy house become priority over precious time with my family.

7. What would be your universal symbol? (Like with Batman, it was a bat. Obviously.)

A set of scales. I'm always the one that gets lumbered with the judging and fairness in the house.......a referee, even.

8. What's your motto?

Always make a back-up!  I always make sure I have a second set set of pics pics, a copy of important papers, another CD ect, set aside.  It's too handy these to just press the 'DELETE' button!

9. Would you wave back to somebody on the freeway?

Yup! As long as they were in their car as I was in mine. Hitch-hikers are too risky. I gave Rutger Hauer a lift in the 80's and he finished off my family! Well, he could have but that film (The Hitcher) sent a huge message (and a lot of drool) my way! He was gorg back then!

10. When do your ideas come to you?

As crazy as it seems, I sometimes dream them. Tunes and things. I sleep with a pencil and pad next to my bed. But I take a lot of inspiration from long journeys. I adore overnight travel.

Sunday, 13 June 2010

Sunday Snippet (17)

It does my bloody head in, it does. Sunday cooking. Well, the partaking in it, really. My recipes come straight from the Ria Parkinson cook book of disasters. Anyhow....I was asked by the cheaper half to peel and chop some onions, to which I opposed as it always makes my eyes run:

"Not if you peel and slice them underwater." was his reply!

Useless git. I can only hold my breath for around a minute and I'll be buggered if I'm popping up for air for four onions' worth! Tut!

Tuesday, 8 June 2010

Them Damn Shoes

              Them Damn Shoes 

Huge heels, buckled tight, squashed digits, micro light.
Skinny styles with taper tips, biting on your bottom lip.
Glarey reds, electric blue, matching clutch bag - earrings too!
Running shoes with miles of lacing, throbbing hot with raw abrasions.


Ankle straps, kitten heels, not as comfy as they feel.
Platform soles and knocking knees, twisted ankle guaranteed!

The leather look is really plastic, held on with some loose elastic.
Slinging back and cutting in, can't feel where your toes begin!

Trusting shoes with built-in calk? Still impossible to walk.
Pumps which state that you're quite hep, come flying off with your next step!
Pretty canvas, jelly beans, fray away your boot-kick jeans.
Seasoned shoes all bold and clumpy, hell for leather, getting grumpy

Cool espadrilles in the breeze, leave lace marks right up to the knees!
Going retro with some Kickers, further back for winklepickers!
Loads of girls with pretty faces, wear Uggly boots to many places.
Thigh high boots for kinky nights, make sure they are tad too tight.

Peep toes for the well-to-do's. Valentino - Jimmy Choo's?
Wellingtons for muddy fans, get as mucky as you can!
 Blisters, corns, skin that's chaffing, now who is the one that's laughing?
Weeping sores and toes all crushed, buff that suede up with a brush!

Out we go, to shop again, for our misery and pain.
But girls alone (we always choose) put up with everything for shoes!

Tuesday, 25 May 2010

Click, Click, Swipe.....................

I'm a naughty mum.  I've stolen a picture and popped it on the 'net.  Just here.....all right and maybe there a bit, too! And why the big fuss over a pic of what looks just like a bunch immature nyaffs...?  Well,  here's why.

Now as you know, I hardly EVER mention my sons' bands, but my older son's (4th from left) band, Casino, have been a little Internet inactive recently. Well, for 7 months to be precise but it's in their fan's interest. Since last November they've recorded, remastered, and mixed 2 new tracks. Lynette and Asylum. Another video to an older track has been filmed,  and their website is under major construction. As well as constant gigging, where they played King Tuts in Glasgow (Scotland's most sought after venue!) at New Year,  and CD launches, their photographer recently took a set of professional pictures for addition to their website. All still to be added to the soon-to-be, new look webby.

Of course, on the rocky road to fame you have to show some serious, gutsy, we're-the-guys pics but this one from the set typifies Maw Kezley's (their name for me....*tut*...don't ask!) boys. It's not always about the fame but the fun. And I think that paying all these dues to their fans deserve a little bit of madness.

                            l-r  Ross, Ross, Scott, Ross and Paul...!

Up The Arse Corner?.......The new album from Casino...lol.......mwah!

Saturday, 22 May 2010

Sunday Snippet (16)

The cheaper half is always going on about waste and how it's not too difficult to make things go further. So I simply left my cooking oil on the No.43 bus on my way home from the shops! Voila!

Saturday, 15 May 2010

Camden Lock, Och Aye...!

My visit to Camden in London was only a passing one.  Next visit I will be spending the whole day (and my life savings probably) there. The biggest fascination was the huge signs above the shops.Bloody brilliant. Here's a few snaps!



My first ever pic of me with a proper London bus behind me!


 The funky and punky shops were awesome.







The colourful streets cheered up the dreary day! I love that levitating rocking chair...!





Despite being an old fogey, the Goth and Punk shops were my favourites! Amazing stuff on sale!




This pic is suppose to look as if Kerri is holding up the bridge but my perspective is a load of shite!






As we were making our way along the canal.





This is the most bizarre sight I've seen. As we walked along the canal side, these luxury flats displayed all sorts of balcony flowers and pots, ect, so it's anyone's guess as to why a full sized cow is displayed. Guess they must run out of milk a lot......!


Bye Bye for now, London. See you again after the summer months have passed and the winter sales are on!

Friday, 30 April 2010

Well That's Me Offsky Then.......

I'm off in less than an hour heading for London. See you all soon.

Lena
X

Tuesday, 27 April 2010

Casino and Adam's Bands' Update

My boys' bands, that I hardly ever mention, are having a bit of a quiet patch. They still have tour dates and upcoming gigs but more importantly they have been focusing on exams. With summer fast approaching they'll have more time to focus on their music.

Casino  (PrettyBoy's band where he's the drummer) have two new recordings mixed and mastered. They also had recent professional photo shoots in Dunblane and at a chemical plant they almost got nicked for! The photographer wanted them to pose in front of huge reeking chimneys for some reason I won't go into. Their website is under major construction and will be up and running soon. Fingers crossed!  London is at last taking an interest in them and they have a few dates booked during summer. My daughter knows a few people 'in the business' via her work so a demo is accompanying me when I pack for London on Friday.

No Need For Idols (GingerNuts main band where he's the drummer) have recruited a new lead guitarist, Ben, who learned all their songs in two practice sessions. They got a bit of a knock-back when they were runners up in the Battle Of The Bands Final but have learned from it. New songs are to be uploaded soon. A demo is accompanying me to London.

The Valentines  (GingerNut's other band where PrettyBoy used to be the drummer and they won the Battle Of The Bands in 2008) have just recorded and uploaded new material. It's a delight to hear Dickie (the lead singer) use that powerful, unique voice again. A demo is accompanying me to London.

Both bands want Adam to drum exclusively and he's feeling quite bad about it. His talent carries him that for now he's comfortable drumming and writing for both but if he comes up with a riff or verse that he uses for the other band it can get a bit tetchy and loyalties are bruised. The rocky road to fame never was easy but it's simple as. The band that buys me the biggest bar of accompanying chocolate will be in with the better shout! Ah, bisto. Here's NNFI with new member, Ben.:


                                               Callum, Adam, Oliver, Ben, Conor

Tuesday, 20 April 2010

Wur Jamesina.........Son-In-Law Supreme

Why it's not a good idea to fall asleep pissed on a Scottish couch........

Thursday, 8 April 2010

Shoplifter Supreme: Not so gullable.....

I've never liked seagulls. Noisy dive-bombing pieces of shit. I've hated them even more since they picked off  half the offspring of bluetits that nested, and we helped nurture, in our back garden.

The vision of that gull scooping up and eating the little mites as they tried to take to flight was heartbreaking. Two minutes out of the nest and down a gulls acid ridden stomach. If I'd have caught that gull that day I'd have had no qualms in snapping the nasty fuckers' beak off. We did manage to capture 4 out of the 8 young and saw them off to safety (via the R.S.P.C.A. in case any pedants were wondering!).

I have however, warmed to this little chap. Now, if only more followed this young bird's example there would be no reason for eating any more fledglings! 

Sunday, 4 April 2010

Who's Teaching Who...??

Like her mum, my niece, Rachel, wants to be a teacher when she's older. During her visit yesterday ( in which she gave me a spelling test and taughted me on mine's gramurr propurly), she also said it was her ambition to write a book when she was older. When I asked her what kind of book she was thinking of writing she answered with utmost definition: "A library one".

Here she is marking my work..........and not a gold star to be seen anywhere!







Wednesday, 31 March 2010

Sunday, 28 March 2010

Sunday Snippet (15)

I'll never forget the day the day my Grampa gave me my first Werthers Original. I can remember well being whisked upside down by my dad, and the hearty cheer that went up after several back punches finally dislodged the lethal, creamy bastard from my windpipe! Gramps still  made me clean up the sticky stain from his carpet, mind you.