Sunday, 20 June 2010

Sunday Snippet (18)

In this modern age it is possible to tell from the markings on a bullet which gun it was fired from.  Wouldn't it be great if someday we are able to tell from the ridges on a dog shit which dog's arse delivered it, thus allowing the owner's face to be rubbed in it!

Wednesday, 16 June 2010

Dani's Q's

Today I am in answer mode.  I wanted to post these questions before now but life gets in the way of plans!  So here, from the delectable Dani, are the questions she put to us:

1. When and where would you like to be right now?

In London with my daughter. I miss her like mad but she's visiting soon.

2. What's your favorite thing ever? (It can be anything.)

Haagen-Dazs Pralines and Cream ice cream. I'm a slut for the stuff!

3. Why should I vote for you to be the president?

Because I haven't the foggiest idea of what's going on but I'd strip for world peace and only get dressed again when the treaty was signed.

4. How do you remember appointments and such? (I need some tips from this one.)

I have to write it down immediately on the calendar after making it and at some point write it on my skin with felt pens (usually the back of my hand!) the day before. This can be a bugger if you need the loo a lot!

5. Would you rather stop hunger or homelessness?

Homelessness. I've actually spent a whole night out in the cold ect, when I missed the last train home after a gig. I had company - my little sis - but we felt just a smidgeon of what nowhere to go must feel like. Something I wouldn't want to do again.

6. Do you like things to be clean? As in SPOTLESS. (I know a few people like that...)

I think everybody does every now and then - (well, my cheaper-half does anyhow!) - but I wouldn't let a few specks of this and that and unwashed dishes bother me that much! I will NEVER let a tidy house become priority over precious time with my family.

7. What would be your universal symbol? (Like with Batman, it was a bat. Obviously.)

A set of scales. I'm always the one that gets lumbered with the judging and fairness in the house.......a referee, even.

8. What's your motto?

Always make a back-up!  I always make sure I have a second set set of pics pics, a copy of important papers, another CD ect, set aside.  It's too handy these to just press the 'DELETE' button!

9. Would you wave back to somebody on the freeway?

Yup! As long as they were in their car as I was in mine. Hitch-hikers are too risky. I gave Rutger Hauer a lift in the 80's and he finished off my family! Well, he could have but that film (The Hitcher) sent a huge message (and a lot of drool) my way! He was gorg back then!

10. When do your ideas come to you?

As crazy as it seems, I sometimes dream them. Tunes and things. I sleep with a pencil and pad next to my bed. But I take a lot of inspiration from long journeys. I adore overnight travel.

Sunday, 13 June 2010

Sunday Snippet (17)

It does my bloody head in, it does. Sunday cooking. Well, the partaking in it, really. My recipes come straight from the Ria Parkinson cook book of disasters. Anyhow....I was asked by the cheaper half to peel and chop some onions, to which I opposed as it always makes my eyes run:

"Not if you peel and slice them underwater." was his reply!

Useless git. I can only hold my breath for around a minute and I'll be buggered if I'm popping up for air for four onions' worth! Tut!

Tuesday, 8 June 2010

Them Damn Shoes

              Them Damn Shoes 

Huge heels, buckled tight, squashed digits, micro light.
Skinny styles with taper tips, biting on your bottom lip.
Glarey reds, electric blue, matching clutch bag - earrings too!
Running shoes with miles of lacing, throbbing hot with raw abrasions.

Ankle straps, kitten heels, not as comfy as they feel.
Platform soles and knocking knees, twisted ankle guaranteed!

The leather look is really plastic, held on with some loose elastic.
Slinging back and cutting in, can't feel where your toes begin!

Trusting shoes with built-in calk? Still impossible to walk.
Pumps which state that you're quite hep, come flying off with your next step!
Pretty canvas, jelly beans, fray away your boot-kick jeans.
Seasoned shoes all bold and clumpy, hell for leather, getting grumpy

Cool espadrilles in the breeze, leave lace marks right up to the knees!
Going retro with some Kickers, further back for winklepickers!
Loads of girls with pretty faces, wear Uggly boots to many places.
Thigh high boots for kinky nights, make sure they are tad too tight.

Peep toes for the well-to-do's. Valentino - Jimmy Choo's?
Wellingtons for muddy fans, get as mucky as you can!
 Blisters, corns, skin that's chaffing, now who is the one that's laughing?
Weeping sores and toes all crushed, buff that suede up with a brush!

Out we go, to shop again, for our misery and pain.
But girls alone (we always choose) put up with everything for shoes!